An Unexpected Source of Information
by Ayngel
Summary: or: How the Insecticons found their way to Earth  G1 crackfic starring the Insecticons and Rumble


**An Unexpected Source of Information. **

**(Or: _How the Insecticons found their way to Earth_)**

**By Ayngel**

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_Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers, or any of the characters or concepts contained within this story. Which is a shame. Cos insecticons are cute._

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Notes: Insecticons are kind of like my latest project - as I always loved them in G1, thinking them all real characters - and nobody seems to have done much with them. (Unless I'm totally wrong - in which case please do correct me!) I've been writing a few Insecticon flashfics on LJ recently. This is the first one I've ventured out to FFnet. It was in response to a prompt: "I don't call it a mistake - I call it a happy coincidence!" I hope you enjoy!

And to all my former readers and reviewers *ducks down guiltily having only posted ONE chapter of something in the past 10 MONTHS ...* I haven't stopped appreciating your kind words and hope life is treating all of you well XD

Here goes:

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Rumble was lost.

The shame of it! He was somewhere in the levels below Kaon, obviously deep because his communications to Soundwave and the rest of the team seemed to have petered out.

And that sucked. Big time! But hey, as long as he kept on going up, he was bound to pick them up again soon. And there was plenty of time, Rumble thought, relaxing a little. According to Lazerbeak's latest information, the Ark was undergoing repairs and wouldn't be able to launch for at least another three cycles.

Humming to himself, the cassette scraped a servo along the wall so that a large gouge appeared in the surface. _Just like I used to do to those flash buildings in Iacon. The stuck up afts! _Whipping out a can of spraypaint, he wrote "Autobots are losers and wooses" in big letters, and drew the Decepticon symbol.

And it felt good. Even though nobody would probably ever see it. And he never would again, if they never came back from this 'mission.'

Happy in a miserable sort of way, Rumble continued on.

...

The large net awaited, suspended high over the tunnel entrance.

Shrapnel made a scoffing noise, but Bombshell tried to sound tolerant. "And what's that for, Kickback?" he asked, kindly.

Kickback couldn't understand either of their attitudes. "Food!" he said. "I mean – come on! There's no energon left here, and stuff all else of anything decent. I'm gonna catch myself an Autobot!"

"Splendid idea," Bombshell agreed.

"Ridiculous, idea, idea!" said Shrapnel. "As if you're going to get any of those down here, here!"

"Well at least I'm trying!" Kickback snapped. "Or d'you wanna feed on tunnel walls for the rest of our existence."

"At least we can survive that way way. I don't see the point in wasting energy knocking up useless devices like that net, net."

"Well it's better than setting off lightning bolts just to watch a few pretty flashes in the tunnels!"

They both looked furious, but Bombshell held up a hand. "Now now!" he said. "A very clever invention, Kickback. Give it a chance, Shrapnel. Give it a chance!"

The antlered insecticon scowled and stormed of into the tunnel.

...

"Good team effort!" said Bombshell as the cassetticon struggled in the net. "You chase, Shrapnel, Kickback catches. Very good indeed!"

Three pairs of large red optics looked at Rumble, who was doing his best to free his arms; because if he could just give a burst with his piledrivers, then the rest would surely take care of itself. Even if the walls did come crashing down on their heads.

"You bits of pitspawned scum!" he seethed through gritted denta. I've heard of you! Scavengers. Thieves!"

"It's got a mouth on it, it" said Shrapnel.

Kickback sighed. "He looked embarrassed. "I didn't really mean to get a Decepticon – we're supposed to be on their side. And this one – he can get a bit stroppy. Got some friends we wouldn't really wanna mess with too."

"You bet!" said the cassette, struggling some more. "I can't even describe what Soundwave's gonna do to you! And Ravage, and Frenzy, and all of 'em. You better let me go now if you don't wanna be a mass of spare parts spread all over Cybertron!"

Kickback looked at Bombshell. "Maybe we should …" he said. "It is a bit of a mistake, this model doesn't even taste all that good."

"On the contrary!" Said Bombshell. "I don't call this a mistake. I call it a very happy coincidence, him and your net being in the same place at the same time. Now we can find out just what Megatron has been up to!"

"You ... _slagafts!_" Struggling hard, Rumble managed to get one arm just free enough. The piledriver mechanism activated with a click.

Bombshell's optics flickered as a device slid out of his forehead, a light coming on. "Well don't just stand there! Grab him, and hold him still!"

Filthy alien forms loomed over Rumble, antennae and antlers twitching as hands clutched at him. He put up one last titanic effort and succeeded in half activating one piledriver; microseconds before electricity seared through him and he felt a sharp blow in his side.

"Careful!" he heard Bombshell's voice with horrible clarity. "He's no good to me damaged!"

Rumble was conscious only of searing pain in his head as the cerebroshell bored into him.

...

"I don't see the point!" said Kickback, looking at the form of the cassette slumped against the tunnel wall. "There's nobody here you could get him to attack!"

"There are other uses for cerebroshells," said Bombshell, regarding Rumble with his head on one side. "Most useful devices!"

Kickback's face lit up. "You're gonna interrogate him!" He said. "That's cool. I watched a Combaticon do that one time. First he pulled this mechs wings off, then he sliced other bits off, and did all kind of gross stuff. This guy was yelling out and everything. He said heaps!"

Shrapnel looked disapproving. "I don't know why you waste your time wandering the streets in search of such entertainment, Kickback, when I can do a far better job than that, that!"

"Yeah, well , It's not the entertainment, is it? It's the technique- see?"

"What would you know, know?" Shrapnel snapped.

But Bombshell chuckled. "Oh I know you have your fun, Shrapnel. And the Decepticons have their own methods – ah yes! All that torture, slow dismemberment, humiliation. Personally, I never have been able to see the point of it. This is a lot simpler, believe me. Rumble's mind is completely under my control. And he will have to answer my questions, and answer them truthfully. There's no need for any further measures."

"I agree, agree" muttered Shrapnel.

"That isn't half so much fun!" grumbled Kickback.

...

The searing pain in his head was exceeded only by the horror of not being able to move.

Rumble could see them perfectly, their hideous forms, their complacent faces. Wings rasped, joints clicked and creaked in an alien way. He wanted to leap up and smash the living Primus out of all of them, send bits of insecticon spattering wide across the tunnel floor. But the cerebroshell pinned him to the spot as effectively as could any physical restraint.

Well it would be all right! _They_ would be looking for him. And when Soundwave found out ... Oh by Primus was he gonna enjoy what happened then ...

It was worth hanging in for.

Bombshell's hideous mask loomed in front of him. "Now," he said. "Tell us about this plan of Megatron's!"

To his horror, Rumble found himself speaking. Calmly. Almost _happily_. As though he were having a chat in a bar back in the old days and talking about the latest developments in building demolition.

"The Autobots are planning a mission to a distant planet," he said. "Megatron has gotten wind of it, and he wants to go after them. This planet - it's got some kinda rich energy resource signature or something. That's all I know."

"Very good," said Bombshell. "And when is he leaving?"

"As soon as Optimus Prime launches. As soon as the Ark is ready. _Soon!_"

"Interesting!" Bombshell nodded. "It is as I thought." Then he turned to his fellow Insecticons.

"Shrapnel, Kickback ... I want you to prepare our ship. Activate a cloaking device and put a tracking beam on the Nemesis. Megatron will follow Prime. We will follow Megatron!"

They hesitated. Kickback looked at Rumble. "What are you gonna do with _him?_" he asked. "Hey - now we've actually caught one, a meal of Decepticon doesn't sound too bad after all!"

"That would hardly advisable," said Shrapnel. "If we're to be all together on a foreign planet somewhere, where!"

"Indeed!" said Bombshell. "Leave him to me. I'll join you in a moment. Oh and Kickback – take that net. I don't want any evidence left here. Just in case."

The other Insecticons slid away.

"Now then, Rumble," said Bombshell. "You will remember none of this conversation. Or anything about this event. You simply got a bit lost on one of the lower levels. All right?"

Carefully, the insecticon extracted the cerebroshell.

...

Damn that high grade must have been good. Rumble rubbed his temple.

High grade? Now wait a minute! There's no such slaggin' thing any more on Cybertron!

Perhaps it was just a nice dream of high grade.

/ Rumble. State whereabouts. /

The transmission was very faint, only just decipherable. Soundwave. His unmistakable tone, filtering through the sledgehammer pounding into his brains like one of his own piledrivers.

/ Rumble. Contact critical. We launch in thirty six thousand astroseconds. /

/ Uhh … I'm on the lower levels. I'm on my way ... / Rumble got to his feet, stumbling around and deactivating his right piledriver, which seemed somehow to have primed itself with out him getting it fully out. Strange ...

/ Rumble ... / the transmission faded.

/ I'm coming! Pit! I had this - vision, Soundwave ... / Rumble started to walk quickly. _Saucer like optics, many legs, mandibles, bristling antennae _were suddenly in his processor.

/ A vision? Repeat? /

What did he just say? Something about a vision. Now, whatever it was faded, and he was slagged if he knew. And what in pit's name was he doing saying something like that to Soundwave?

/ Nothin'! / he said, emphatically. / I must have been - uh - just thinking about high grade! /

_THE END_


End file.
